The Backup Plan: A Grandchild in His Grandmother’s Belly But Also A Nephew in his Aunt’s

Michelle and Jonathon (Jono) were high school friends who parted ways after graduation but fate brought them back together. They fell deeply in love and as made plans to start a family, realized that it may not come together traditionally. They encountered An unexpected plot twist in pursuing their dream of becoming parents.

Michelle and Jono had been friends in high school but when she ran into him during a stroll around town things were quite different. There was an undeniable spark after losing contact for several years. Michelle jokes that he suddenly became attractive as if he wasn’t before. Maybe he was and she just didn’t notice until that moment.

Michelle knew that she would have obstacles when she decided to start a family and she of course disclosed all this to Jono right off the bat. She was never known as one to let some obstacles or challenges stand in the way of what she wanted and luckily Jono was the same. Jono loved her wholeheartedly and vowed to support her every step of their journey together.

Michelle greatly anticipated motherhood and raising children with Jono so saving money from the start for IVF was the main investment in her piggy bank. The journey was about to get harder and more emotional as time went on. They both knew the longer they waited the harder it would become especially as their 30s approached.

According to doctors, Michelle would still be able to carry a baby but it could cause some serious complications. Undergoing such a pregnancy would be nothing short of risky. As studies suggest there are increased risks than in a normal pregnancy.

Both Michelle and Jono started to try to get pregnant almost immediately after they got engaged despite not being sure they wanted to dive into parenthood right away. They realized that the road to even becoming pregnant would be long and difficult to conceive so they rationalized their head start. Although things were about to get tricker than they originally thought.

Being so close to her mother Jasmina Pandevski, and sister-in-law, Sophie Falzon, Michelle confided in them both the struggles and the emotional rollercoaster that she and her now husband Jono faced. Jasmina raising Michelle and her siblings and Sophie with a family of her own both experienced motherhood up close and wanted more than anything for Michelle to be able to have those special moments with kids of her own.

Jasmina, Michelle’s mother says that she knew how much Michelle wanted to be a mother.  As told by Jasmina, Michelle, is “a school teacher, she loves kids.” She and her daughter have always had a close relationship and she only wished that Michelle could have the same relationship with her future child.

Additionally, after countless rounds of IVF treatments, Michelle finally got pregnant through the process of egg collection and embryo transfer as well. She remembers feeling overwhelmed with relief at the success and having feelings of gratitude. Nevertheless, she still took everything with a gram of salt while Jono raced to think of baby names.

Despite Michelle being guarded and skeptical about a smooth pregnancy, Jono immediately as he put it, “was already onto baby names.” He even wrote down some names in secrecy to start their list.

Many people struggle with fertility issues. In married couples, an average of 1 to every 5 couples where the woman is in her 30s has trouble conceiving their first child. If you have health struggles or limitations that number is even greater.

Michelle was immediately put on bed rest and spent the remainder of her pregnancy with serious anxiety. She couldn’t enjoy even a single moment of pregnancy because she was so afraid of something going wrong.

Their baby did manage to survive for several days but infection levels rising meant that unfortunately Michelle and Jono had to face the reality that they needed to part with their child.

Jono remembers that day in the delivery room, there were about five other women giving birth and screaming at the top of their lungs and he felt devastated knowing that his wife was about to give birth to a baby that wouldn’t make it.

Michelle said that she, “felt like my body had failed my child…” in that she couldn’t protect him. The dangers didn’t stop there, as Michelle pushed out her placenta she developed a hemorrhage and needed to be rushed into the ER.

To their luck, Michelle made a quick recovery and managed to stabilize rather quickly. Both Jono and Michelle even managed to spend some numbered moments with their newborn, Ralph, even if it was cut short.

After such trauma and tragedy, it can be a long journey to recover but Jono and Michelle were lucky to have such an incredible support system around them. From the worst time in their lives stemming from deep hopelessness, their families became closer than ever.

After all that this young couple went through, Jasmina and Sophie decided to jump into action at the chance to help Michelle and Jono start a family of their own. Jasmina, at age 52 got pregnant with Michelle and Jono’s baby while Sophie, age 34, also carried another of their babies at the same time, but not the way you think.

Before embarking on this surrogacy journey Sophie was not familiar with this process but she knew that she would do anything for her sister-in-law and brother.

For Michelle’s mother Jasmina, her maternal instincts kicked in and she wanted to protect her daughter from any additional health complications like what she endured that threatened her life.

Both Jasmina and Sophie offered to help Jono and Michelle without being asked making it an even more beautiful and selfless thing to do for the ones they love. Jono and Michelle were both touched by their willingness to go through with this surrogacy. It is no easy journey.

They all immediately went to Michelle’s doctor to tell him of the idea and proceeded with caution. Ultimately her doctor was in favor but advised psychological counselling and tests to be conducted throughout.

Jasmina, even though she was both healthy and in shape, she was almost considered not able to carry a child because of her age so everyone involved had to move quickly to speed up the process and put it into effect.

Jasmina was also quite surprised by the situation she ended up in for the reason that she hadn’t pictured revisiting pregnancy during this stage in her life let alone for her grandchild. But as she puts it, “It’s just, they need an oven and I have to cook it.”

Sophie at the same time also wanted to fall pregnant rather quickly since she also wanted to resume her career. She took a very technical approach as simply being the carrier vessel for Michelle and Jono’s baby.

Both Sophie and Jasmina, besides both of them offering to be the couple’s surrogate, the most surprising part is that they both fell pregnant within seven weeks of one another.

As Michelle and Jono continue to explain to those around them and strangers alike, they are the genetic parents to both children conceived through IVF, and Jasmina and Sophie are simply carrying them to term.

Before the wonderful successes of surrogacies Jono and Michelle’s journey to become parents was a difficult one but not without immense love and acceptance. They struggled with fertility issues and the loss of a baby that Michelle was carrying at 19 weeks.

In Michelle’s words, simply put, “Fertility sucks. It is just all-consuming.” Michelle says it ends up being “all you think about. It is all you want. You will do anything in order to become pregnant and have a child.” But approaching the journey with love and understanding for each other is key.

Part of the need to document every step of this pregnancy journey is also due to having these babies know where they come from and their unique journey to get here.

Brothers Hugo, left, and Spencer, right were not born far away from each other with Hugo being born in December 2022 while his brother, Spencer, in January 2023. Talk about being almost twins!

When Hugo was first born, the fears Michelle and Jono harbored melted away. It was both an intense and emotional time but a beautiful birth. It took Michelle some time to actually realize that this was her new reality as a mom.

Michelle even got to participate in her babies’ births by having special roles to help her connect to her children’s first moments.

Michelle’s younger son even pays a special tribute to his aunt who carried him to term through his name, Spencer Louis Harley.

This family isn’t so little anymore and it is lovely to see how their growth and journey despite hardships has a happy ending. Both surrogates have since recovered and have taken on their rightful roles as Aunt Sophie and Grandma Jasmina.